ATLANTA – As images of tsunami destruction continue to flood television and newspapers, parents can follow guidelines to help their children cope with the disaster. While ignoring or minimizing the situation might seem like an appropriate parental response, experts say parents must face the disaster with children, being a reassuring presence and source of information as questions arise.
Because children will inevitably hear about the disaster or see images of the destruction, it is best to "be real with your children about the scary part of this. Be honest about the many homeless and hurting people, many of them children," said Bo Prosser, the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship’s congregational life coordinator.
The Fellowship has provided online resources and guidelines for talking with children about the tsunami disaster. Prosser said the resources are theologically solid and should equip parents to handle any tough questions a child might ask. "These resources give handles for ongoing discussion and care for children and their concerns. The children may not be asking theological questions; they may just be seeking help in how to cope with the fears they are facing," he said.
According to written guidelines by Diana Garland and Helen Harris of Baylor University’s school of social work, "Our children hear the words, see the images, and watch our stricken faces for reassurance."
As children wonder about their own safety, parents can restore security and normalcy by continuing with a child’s regular routine. Parents should also provide children with information about the disaster in simple, age-appropriate language. In order to develop healthy coping skills, children should be allowed to question and express their feelings about the disaster. "We need to help children accept that sometimes we all feel sad and angry," wrote Rob Sauls of ShoeStrings Kid’s Ministry.
The need for the latest information leads some families to leave the television on constantly, but too much exposure can frighten children. Limiting a child’s media intake of the disaster can prevent the traumatizing effects of overexposure, according to Kenneth Meyers, associate pastor of Hendricks Avenue Baptist Church in Jacksonville, Fla. Meyers suggests that parents watch the news with older children.
Children also need an opportunity to respond to the disaster. Whether it’s giving their allowance to a school fund-raising effort or writing letters to survivors and long-term relief workers, children need a way to combat the helplessness they feel. "Children are better able to regain their sense of power and security if they feel they can help in some way," wrote Meyers.
Children will also look to parents as an example of faith. "Parents must use this opportunity to model faith that helps us not despair. We must model the concepts of peace and grace and our ultimate belief that our fate rests in the hands of a loving God," wrote Garland and Harris.
The guide is available at http://www.thefellowship.info/CL/FF/CMResources/Disaster.icm. There is also a two-minute video on talking to children on the Fellowship’s Web site at www.thefellowship.info/AsiaMedia.icm.
CBF is a fellowship of Baptist Christians and churches who share a passion for the Great Commission and a commitment to Baptist principles of faith and practice. The Fellowship’s mission is to serve Christians and churches as they discover and fulfill their God-given mission.